Sunday Reflection: March 22, 2015

Heyy all,

Just an update from last post, I have found the jacket I was looking for. It turns out that it has been sitting at the hair salon for about 3 weeks. I really do think I am forming memory loss, which is not good.

Anyway, some weird things happened yesterday and last night. My mom and I were able to see my little cousins and my aunt and uncle at the local Rainforest Cafe. My little cousins enjoyed seeing all of the rain forest animals. During the lunch, my mom took my baby cousin over to the big fish tank. When they were there, she was saying "Nonno, Nonno, Nonno". Some of you may know that my grandfather (Nonno) passed away in September of 2013, exactly a month before my baby cousin was born. Therefore, my cousin was not able to meet my grandfather. The fact that she was calling for him is a little freaky because that means that maybe she saw his spirit.

That night when my mom and I were going to sleep, we heard a weird noise. We looked at the dogs to see if it was them but it wasn't and then we realized what it was. The noise was coming from the radio in the kitchen. For some odd reason, the radio turned on by itself. This is the second time this has happened and I am beginning to think that my grandfather has something to do with it. Maybe he is trying to send us messages.

My stress has not gone down at all. I am currently researching stress relievers. I think the biggest stress I have is not knowing what college I am transferring to. I know that I will go somewhere but I don't know where exactly. There are times when I think I am not going to get in anywhere because that's what I like to do. I like to put myself down for no reason and I don't know why. Why do people do that? Why do people waste the time to put themselves down when they could be using that time to build themselves up?

Well thats all for now but I will try and post later on.
Love you all,
Hannah

Stressing big time!!

Hi all,
I don't know why but I have been stressing so much this week and it shouldn't be this way because I am on Spring Break. With setting up pages for the school newspaper to trying to find my favorite jacket, I don't know which is stressing me more; or maybe its a combo of both. To be honest, I think its my jacket thats stressing me more. It may seem so minuscule to be stressing over finding a jacket but to me its so much more. Lately, I have been forgetting a lot more stuff. I am remembering to do things at the last minute and sometimes I remember to do things when it is too late. I am scared that me forgetting things will lead into something so much more. What if I am getting memory loss? I am only 20 years old, its too early for me to be forgetting things like this. I have been praying to find my jacket not only because I just want my jacket but I have been beating myself about this for so long. I keep telling myself that I am stupid for loosing clothes. I have been calling myself stupid a lot and I think that is what is making it worse. It has gotten to a point that I am crying over this. So stupid, right? Majority of today was spent crying over where my jacket is and then the other part of today was telling myself that I am stupid for loosing or forgetting something. See now that I am thinking about my jacket again, I have started to cry again. I know I will find it somewhere but it is just killing me that I don't know where it is. If it is at school, I hope it stays where ever it is until I get to it. If it is at someones house, than I hope they or I will find it soon because I would like to stop telling myself that I am stupid. It may seem so simple but if you call all pray that I find my jacket, that would be great!

Thanks and I will keep you all updated!